Scalpel ...

So, if to write is to bleed and to spill your guts all over the page, I'm going to have to do a CSI on the topic that hurts the most: my still-single state at the starting-to-fall-apart age of 44.

I know that sounds entirely negative, which, of course, presents a problem. It indicates I am not satisfied. That I've failed God's command to be content, regardless of my circumstances (Philippians 4:11). As a good, Christian girl, I am expected to do exactly that.

So, how does someone who has longed for marriage and a family all her life--and now finds herself facing menopause still husband- and child-less--find contentment in her singleness?

Well, if I'm going to be honest, that's really not the question I want to ask. Because I think it's okay to be sad that I'm still single. I believe I need to grieve what I have lost to time. And I think to do otherwise would be nothing more than a feeble attempt to mask the pain.

It's time to grieve. How did Solomon put it?

"There is a time for every event under heaven-- ... A time to weep, and a time to laugh; A time to mourn, and a time to dance."
~Ecclesiastes 3:1b, 4

First, we give ourselves time to be sad.

Then we dance.

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