Today, I don’t have time to grieve my singleness, as I watch from a distance the deterioration of a dear friend’s husband. Now in a medically induced coma with multiple organ failure, Jim’s doctors no longer have much hope.

It’s not often you get to witness two soulmates meet and fall in love. But that’s exactly what happened when Brenda met Jim. We’d been friends for several years & I had watched her turn down one guy after another. She wasn’t a flirt, but with her long blonde hair, quirky sense of humor & passion for God, she did get quite a bit of attention from men. But Brenda believed God had something else in mind.

Then Jim showed up. We called him Happy Jim. Mostly because he was always smiling, but also because we had three Jims in our group at the time: Just Plain Jim, Tall Jim ... & Happy Jim. I don’t know what it was, but there was something about him that drew Brenda from the beginning. All her life, men had pursued her. Now, she saw what she wanted & she wasn’t afraid to let him know how she felt.

Of course, he fell pretty hard, too. A few dates in & they couldn’t keep their hands off of each other. They adored spending time together — heading up into the mountains to see the moose or ski or just cuddle by the fire. Most of all, I remember a lot of laughing. They were head over heels and that October, I slipped into a gold bridesmaid dress & rejoiced as they said their “I dos.”

I didn’t get to see Brenda as much after the wedding. Their lives changed as did mine, but the time we did get to spend together was precious to me. Then I got laid off of my job & ended up moving to another state.

Last fall, I received the news that Jim had been diagnosed with cancer. It seemed too unbelievable & heartbreaking & just plain wrong.

And now my friends are there, 1,200 miles away, suffering, & I’m here — helpless, sobbing alone in my car & trying to pray ... anyway. I wish I could be there; I wish I could help; I wish I knew magic words to say that would convince God to heal my friend & make things right again.

But I can’t & I don’t.

So we wait. . . .


Sally said...

You write so beautifully, Sharyn. My heart hurts for Brenda and for you. Cancer is an evil enemy. It respects no one. Prayers.

Hohna Hartley said...

hey sharyn. it's awful to hear this about jim. i definitely remember them getting together, and even you being in their wedding. fun memories, but so shocking to hear such tragic news. i'm really sorry, and i'm praying for jim, brenda and you.